.theendooftheline.
8:12 p.m. || 2004-04-01
[mood: ruined. as most of the time. 
]
[music: Disturbed - Down With the Sickness]
At the end of the day, the elements are against me.
Jonthan's voice provides sad-rolledeyes-behindeyelids-molten comfort for the teenage angst-filled heart. Certainly not for the faint-hearted. Deftones might be too haunting for the imaginative, and might deprive you of a peaceful sleep. Makes your heart beat faster. 'Change' is recommended.
I would just like to comment about a few things.
Trying to make me turn away from the 'hate-school' phase is terribly impossible at this stage of my life. Unless you can give me something worth it to look forward to learning the things they teach in school, I'm still going to hate my highschool year no less. It was good effort on your part, but I certainly could've dealt with less bitterness. I could even say that I was better in controlling my feelings than you.
My mother shouted at me because the school gave me projects to do. (eg. English, Geography.) I'm fed up of everything everyone wants me to do. Fuck you. There.
Relief is still in tow; I think this is my form of running away from things, to not want to do anything. Too many things shouting in my ear. I hardly even write anymore. My dreams are dissolving into little dribblets and sliding off to a part of my mind that's hidden away from me.
Sigh.
Perhaps angst is a thing that I can't avoid. I wonder if I would still angst when I'm 30. I fear becoming just like my mother. Must refrain from nagging.
This is the only thing that I thought stood out from my writing in the past month:
They feel the Sun at their soles, they feel the warmth flutter about in their stomachs. One sits against the tree, letting the shade try to fight the light. The other lets his bones soften against the first, his backbone loose as the other supports him, his world, his life. If the first falls, he will fall as well, and the Earth in its entirety will cave in and collapse all around them.
Life has never been finer.
I wish life were finer. Simpler. Richer.
[Icon of the Day: 
]
No. A person doesn't just wake up and stop loving somebody! ~Buffy, "I Only Have Eyes For You"
